Unbearable Solitude...

The last Sunday afternoon was one of the worst afternoons I have had in a very very long long time. We had a couple of relatives at our home in the morning. All of them had come to see my little nephew, the six month old, darling of the house. We had a nice time the whole morning, cracking jokes, talking about old times, playing with my nephew. But soon after lunch, my relatives had to leave. And soon after they left, it was time for my parents, my bro and s-i-l and "Cuckoo", our little Hero too to leave. They were all driving down to Kerala for a week's vacation.

I ofcourse, was having one of the most busiest weeks in office and so could not even dream of leaving town and so had to stay put and "gaurd" the house. Some time after lunch everyone drove away in my bro's car, leaving me behind to enjoy my freedom. This was not the first time that I was staying alone. I was used to staying alone since High School. I infact, relished the opportunity of staying alone in Bangalore. The unfettered freedom was a gift that I loved (and my mom hated, coz when she came back , she would be the one facing the kitchen that would have suffered at the hands of my unskilled culinary experiments.) Oh !!! how I was going to enjoy lazing at home, not having to keep the house clean, sleeping when I wanted, waking when I wanted, watching all the channels that I wanted, not having to watch all the Asianet, Surya, Kairali and DD Malayalam news channels. The joys of freedom was indeed sweet.

But not this time. This time just after a few minutes after everyone had left, I started feeling extremely lonely. I guess it was the sudden abscence of my nephew, who had been the centre of everything at home. My house which was a witness to bustling activity for the last few months, was now all of a sudden silent. I could even hear the water dripping in the kitchen sink. The whole house had an eerie feeling. It was just half of an hour since everyone had left. But I was already feeling like a lonely sailor marooned on a remote island in the middle of nowhere. I was beginning to hate it. I am sure, some of you atleast have felt the horrible feeling of loneliness sometime in your life. My problem was that I was feeling this even worse, because I was coming down from the high pedestal, that of having a happy baby in the house to suddenly not a soul in the whole house. It was so lonely, that I am sure even the spirits and ghosts that wandered around had fled.

I opened the address book in my mobile and flipped through all my friends names. I thought of calling them up and talking to them for sometime. But then felt it was so unfair. All of them get just one Sunday to spend with their better halves and I did not want to spoil it. I flipped through all the bachelors nos.... but then none of the other four bachelors were in town. They had either gone to their hometown or were out of town on work. Oh my god !!! the sudden solitude was unbearable. For probably the first time in life, I felt the abscence of a a girlfriend. I wished I had been smart enough to attract some lass to be my girlfriend. Someone whom I could talk to and feel better. I switched on the TV, hoping to catch some nice movie. But I was so terribly lonely that not even "Unfaithful" could make me feel better. I kept switching channels till I finally slept off in front of the TV.

But my peace was shortlived. The phone rang. It was my cousin sister, checking to see if my parents had indeed left as planned. I spoke to her, half sleepy, half awake. We spoke for some time and she must have assumed that I was drunk, coz I was dozing off during the conversation and she had to repeat everything a second time. I apologised to her for my rudeness and promised to call her back later. I kept the phone down and tried to put myself to sleep once more. I tried different positions. I twisted and turned. But no luck. I just could not fall asleep any more. I was wide awake and was once again having the quaint feeling of loneliness creeping in on me. I wished I had listened to my parents and got hitched. I would atleast have someone who would be bound by her oath to stay with me in my hour of need.

I switched channels once more trying to get something intresting to watch. Manchester United were playing someone else, but I really could not watch it anymore. I decided to get up and leave. I had to attend a reception in the evening, which I was trying to put off. But sitting at home was not an option anymore. I decided it would be a far better idea to attend the reception and catch up with friends. I had a quick bath and left. My evening turned out far far better than the worst afternoons in a loong time.